I tried meth for the first time at age 18 and I thought it was no big deal. I didn’t understand why people made such a fuss about it or even enjoyed doing it regularly as the “head change” that came with it wasn’t really a high. Little did I know, at that moment, the seed of addiction had planted itself deep into my being. Years later, I was at a party and people were doing meth. When offered, I did some, remembering that the last time I used it that it didn’t “ruin” anything about me. This night I was also drinking and the meth allowed me to drink more and stay up longer. Meth also helped me to be more social and it seemed I had found the “new” me. At the time it all seemed harmless, in fact it seemed great. These behaviors continued over the next couple years with very few negative effects on my life.
Ten years passed before I knew it and I had developed such a dependence on meth [to exist] that I literally did what ever I had to do to get it. I went from snorting it, to eating it, then smoking it and finally shooting it. I went so far as to learn how to make it. Meth had taken over my life. I became a liar, a cheater, and a thief. Meth took me to jail several times, and near death in the hospital twice. My last three years of use I was nothing more than a slave to the substance. I was emotionally and spiritually dead and physically sick. I had become unemployable and dependent on others for survival.
Thanks to the help of a 12 step program, lots of prayers, and some influential people in my life, I have not had to use meth for a little over two years now. I am grateful to the state for the “drug court” program which helped me to repair my life and understand that “change” is possible. If you are struggling with a dependence to meth there is help and there is hope. Don’t give up on yourself and do something while you can. If you know someone struggling with meth there is help and there is hope. Don’t give up on them, and help them get help while they can. If you have never tried meth DON’T. ---Anonymous
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The cloak of death was hovering over him like a low cloud on a rainy day. It was clear he was at the point with his addiction that he would either need an intervention or he would die. I received phone call after phone call, from hospital after hospital about my loved one….a mere 19 years old chronologically, but still an emotional child. …As a mental health professional, I could look and see where my precious loved one, an honor role student and a private high school graduate, got derailed. Handsome, intelligent, funny and extremely sensitive…..he had it all…or so I thought. Looking more introspectively at his life and family history of trauma, including divorce, I could see how it exacerbated his genetic predisposition to addiction. To cope with his emotional pain, he probably started to use and became developmentally and emotionally arrested at about age 15…and by 19, he was near death.
Trying to mobilize family members that were either in denial, enabling or just at a loss for what to do, was frustrating, and proved almost impossible. He would no longer return my calls….the cloak was getting closer and closer…..I cried many nights thinking about his funeral and how it would devastate those of us left behind who loved him so much. I kept pushing ahead, though…..and pushed those around me as well……The silver lining in this story is that that while it took a near death overdose that almost caused permanent neurological impairment, today, he has been in a treatment facility for almost 3 months. He is working so hard…..as is his family, to understand, to get healthy themselves…there is a glimmer of the boy we knew before……..we got him before the grim reaper did, this time…..my bottom line message to you is there is hope for life and change. --Anonymous
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